Porch Crawlers

A Bitten Word Recipe 

Ladies and gents, it has been a busy summer!

Zach traveled a lot for work, Clay started a new job, and we planned a wedding that's happening two weeks from Saturday (!).

There's a lot we're itching to blog about. There are, of course, recipes we're eager to share (including another eggplant dish we've found that we love and a pie that will make your head explode). We also want to tell you about our experience planting our first garden this summer (spoiler alert: we're not great gardeners). And we'll share a bit about our wedding plans and festivities.

But for the moment, we're heading to the beach for a week with our friends for some much needed down time.  We're packing four months of unread New Yorkers, a whole lot of sunscreen and a big stack of food magazines.

And while we're there, we may just make Porch Crawlers.

First, a word of warning:

This is not a fancy-pants, sip-it-out-of-a-crystal-goblet kind of cocktail.

This is a party drink. A very stiff party drink.

And it's more than a little trashy.

But if you're hosting a Labor Day barbecue and you're looking for a drink that will get the parted started, look no further.

So what is a Porch Crawler?

We first heard about them from our friends Scott and Charlie, of West Virginia weekend fame.

According to Scott, he and his friend Matt have been making this drink since college. In fact, for years he carried around the recipe scrawled on the back of an old envelope. Scott says there are lots of drinks out there called Porch Crawlers, but he thinks that this mixture, honed over years of tinkering, is the best he's come across.

So why are they called Porch Crawlers?

When you head home after the night is over, you have to crawl up your porch steps to get back in the house.

And what's in them?

Vodka, beer and lemonade concentrate. That's it.

We know, we know! It doesn't sound good. But trust us, it's delicious. 

See you in a week!  It's going to be an amazing Fall.

 

Porch Crawlers for a crowd
A Bitten Word Recipe with kudos to our friend Scott

Ingredients:

• 1 handle of very cold Skyy Vodka
• 18-pack of light beer (Scott recommends Keystone Ice)
• 4 to 8 cans of lemonade concentrate

Into a large cooler, pour the vodka and beer. Add 4 cans of lemonade concentrate. Stir and taste. Continue adding lemonade concentrade until you're pleased with the taste. Serve over ice.  

If you'd rather serve the drink straight, you can also pre-freeze water in freezer bags, and then drop those bags into the cooler to keep the drink cold.

 

Comments

[Kelsey]

My sorority sisters and I looooooooooooves these. Though, I don't think we ever used anything as classy as Skyy. Also, we would use a case of beer (usually Milwaukee's Best aka 'Beast') instead of a 12 pack and its still delicious.

[Josie]

One of my favorite summer drinks. We call them Summer Beers or Brews in MO and KS. They definitely sneak up on you!

[Allison]

I've found that a 5:1:1 ratio of beer to vodka to pink lemonade concentrate (ends up being 24 beers, a handle of vodka, and 5 cans of pink lemonade concentrate) is the best mix for me. Loved them up at Dartmouth! They were Psi U's house drink...

[Michael Lackey]

I've made similar substituting the vodka for tequila and the lemonade concentrate for limeade concentrate...beergaritas!

[Elizabeth]

I just had this for the first time 2 weeks ago when I was up north with some girlfriends. One of the girls made it, although she called it 'Hillbilly Lemonade.' It was great!

[Julie]

On the west coast we make a version called Baja Margaritas. One beer, one can limeade, fill the limeade container with tequila and then again with water. They are great frozen!

[John]

Been making these for about 10 years now, always a party hit! The way I learned it is with either pink or raspberry lemonade concentrate. We call it "PPD", pink panty dropper or potent pink drink, depending on the humor level of the crowd :)

[Debra]

Porch Crawlers, aka "Hop, Skip and Go Naked?"

[Shannyn]

My friend made this my sophomore year in college for her birthday bash and I was in love. YUM!

[Matt]

This may be a silly question, but how much is a "handle" of vodka? Is that a 750 ml bottle?

[Zack]

A handle refers to a 1750 ml bottle. They, uh, usually have handles on the sides.

[Sam]

In college my friends and I were introduced to the "Hoosier". To make: empty 1 can Lime-aid concentrate into a blender; fill the Lime-aid can with Seagrams 7 add that to the blender, add one light beer, blend and enjoy.

It's frothy, cold, and delicious

[Monkey]

Ha, we always called these "strip and go nakeds" in college. You can imagine why :)

[Jamie]

We also called these Strip and Go Naked :). We had several variations of this drink we substituted orange juice concentrate and called them Sneaky Petes or swapped tequila for the vodka and limeade for the lemonade and called them Idiot Margaritas. They were all a little trashy but in college we really didn't care.

Thanks for reminding me of some tasty drinks from my wild days.

[NiquieR]

Has Jared never told you about these? We call it Summer Beer. This is his party staple! We make ours with 2 IPA's, Pink Lemonade concentrate, and generally Ketel One.

Enjoy your vacation!

[Tom]

In WA (and to college students) these are called Pink Panty Droppers.

[clive]

enjoy the vacation

[Alisa]

Fun to see this post!Love it!

[Caitlin]

Adding to the list of alternative names, we used to call this "scream and go naked punch" (for obvious reasons) and used to make them in bulk, i.e. 1 case of beer, 1 handle of vodka, 1 container Country Time Lemonade. OMG, I still shudder at the thought of the hangovers these induced.

[Ashley]

My boyfriend and I love this drink! Although we are never use anything as classy as sky (pearl actually works just fine and has been on sale lately for 8 bucks a liter!) and we mix it with Lienenkugel's Summer Shandy, which already has lemonade in it. Awesome!

[laura]

We make something similar called a Slimey Limey....

4 cups ginger ale
3 cups vodka
2 beers
1 can limeade concentrate

LOVE these... many infamous nights on the deck with these!

[Kait]

Love these other names! And alternative mix-in options! I have only ever heard it called Skippy and boy do we make it by the bucketful at all my Virginia college parties!!

[Jennie]

All our friends thought this was amazing last night! Thanks so much!

[Pam]

I so get the New Yorker thing I'm only 2 months behind. Happy wedding.,

[JamieK]

In Texas we call this a Hop, Skip and go Naked! I think I like Porch Crawler better; yes, I think I'll start calling them Porch Crawlers.

Laura, I think I'll have to try your Slimey Limey this weekend!

[Erin]

We made this all the time in college! We would "borrow" a gatorade cooler from the athletic department for our parties. We called it Skip'n'Go. We changed things a little. We used: 24 Bud Lites, 1 handle of the cheapest vodka possible (Kamchatka), 1 container of pink lemonade powder, and 2 cans pink lemonade concentrate. We loved this so much and actually used it at our school sponsored Senior Picnic. The faculty advisor didn't really understand the potency!